“Just move it to the side a little bit. Ok, now just shove it in. Perfect!” Erica exclaimed as she basked in the glow of her most excellent trunk packing skills. “For a second there, I was worried it wasn’t all going to fit.”

“First off, that’s what she said. And secondly, we wouldn’t have had to play suitcase tetris if Hannah hadn’t packed her entire wardrobe.” snarked Alyssa.

“Please, you’ll both be sorry when you’re repeating outfits.” emo-ed Hannah complete with death glare, “Besides everything crammed in there just fine.”

“You’re right, we didn’t need that rear window anyway.” said Erica and the death glares ensued, “But enough about luggage! Let’s get this show on the road!” And with that they all piled into their nice, comfy rental SUV (Alyssa insisted on using her acquired years to procure transportation) and headed off into the sunset…

3 HOURS LATER

Alyssa: I think we’re lost.

Erica: Think or know?

Alyssa: Um, I’m supposing really. For the definitive answer we should probably ask Hannah, she’s the one with the map.

Hannah: Oh, I KNOW we’re lost.

Erica: Well it might have been nice if you told us. I mean we’re not telekinetic or anything.

Alyssa: I think you mean telepathic.

Hannah: WHATEVER! It doesn’t matter! We’re lost, I’m hungry, and the ipod has gone dead. This is officially a disaster!

Trying to distract herself from her lack of telepathic powers, Hannah whips out her blackberry and begins twittering fast and furiously. Meanwhile, Alyssa is trying to find some semblance of a radio station on this godforsaken stretch of road and Erica is trying to dislodge a soda from the cooler. Not exactly what you’d call a “good start” to what was supposed to be a road trip for the ages. You see the girls had been on this huge Kerouac bender and with On the Road as their inspiration, it was decided that it would be a good idea to make a trip of their own. Actually, harebrained ideas like this happen quite often. I mean you should have seen what happened when they read The Three Musketeers (note to friends: let none of them near sharp objects). ANYWAY, now they’re driving lost in the middle of nowhere when it suddenly starts to rain (I’m talking an all out downpour here people); luckily for our intrepid heroes,  Erica spies something from her perch in the back seat.

Erica: I think I see something.

Hannah: It’s probably just the impending doom that approaches with this soul crushing rain.

Alyssa: Well someone is certainly glass half empty.

Hannah: What about “middle of nowhere” and “torrential downpour” screams glass half full to you!

Alyssa (under her breath): Emo.

*Cue Death Glare*

Erica: No seriously, it looks like…

Alyssa: a bird?! a plane?!

Hannah: Imminent Death?

Erica: I think it’s a Biodome.

Because Alyssa has a flair for the dramatic, she slams on the brakes at the mere mention of this. What she forgets is that she is driving in the heretofore established terrible weather conditions. So of course, they begin to hydroplane. Fortune is on their side though because Alyssa had recently taken an ultimate driving class and is therefore well prepared to deal with a situation such as this. Five minutes of shrill screaming later, the car came to an abrupt halt. The good news was that the girls were fine; the bad news was that they now had a flat tire.

Hannah: ARE YOU TRYING TO KILL US?!!!

Alyssa: Yeah, sorry about that. It’s just, well I heard the word Biodome…and then I got a little excited…and well, you know that I have a flair for the dramatic.

Hannah: THAT IS NO EXCUSE!

Alyssa: Look, if you’d seen the movie you wouldn’t be such a naysayer.

Erica: What movie?

Alyssa: Biodome. *Met with blank stares* You know, the late 90s Pauly Shore vehicle that also featured Stephen Baldwin and Joey Lauren Adams. *More Blank Stares* Free Mahi Mahi?!

Hannah: WHAT DOES THAT EVEN MEAN?!

Erica: Um, I’m not really sure but you’re talking in all caps again.

Hannah: UM, WE ALMOST DIED! I HAVE A RIGHT TO BE TALKING IN ALL CAPS!

Erica: Almost doesn’t count. Besides the more important issue at hand is that now we’re down a tire.

Alyssa: That shouldn’t be a problem. We’ll just replace that one with the spare.

Erica: Maybe if I hadn’t taken out the spare to make room for Hannah’s luggage we could have, but at this point I think that option is moot.

Hannah: ARE YOU TELLING ME WHERE STRANDED?!

Erica: I’m telling you maybe you shouldn’t have packed so much.

Alyssa: And I’m telling both of you that we need to find the Biodome.

Once again the car erupted into a cacophony of screaming and yelling. YOU’RE OUT OF YOUR MIND! WE DON’T EVEN KNOW WHERE IT IS! DO YOU KNOW WHAT RAIN IS GOING TO DO TO MY HAIR?! WE’RE IN THE MIDDLE OF NOWHERE!WE DON’T EVEN KNOW WHEN SOMEONE WILL BE ALONG TO FIND US! were just a few of the loudly shrieked sentiments. This continued for about 20 minutes before finally:

Alyssa: ENOUGH! Look at us! We’re behaving like crazy harpie banshees! We are civilized ladies and as such can find a more reasonable way to settle this dispute.

Erica: What did you have in mind?

Alyssa: Rock. Paper. Scissors.

Since it was two against one, Hannah and Erica had to decide who would be playing in the match. Ultimately it would be a Hannah vs. Alyssa title fight.

Erica: Alright, you two know the rules. No throwing out Jesus, Spock, or Lizard. Best two out of three. On my mark, Ready. Set. Go!

After a harrowing second round, in which Alyssa and Hannah continued to throw down the same signs, Alyssa finally emerged the winner.

Alyssa: Biodome, here we come!

Hannah: We better not get lost out in the wilderness.

Erica: Oh, we won’t.

Hannah: How can you be so sure?

Erica: Because this time we’re not giving you the map.

*Death Glare Stare*

And off they trudged into the night with nothing but the light from Alyssa’s iphone to guide them…